if you hate disappointment, i have the perfect solution for you

It’s called expect nothing. Listen, I’m not going to sugar coat this article and tell you that I stepped foot in a certain house, had an amazing conversation with a certain girl, and immediately knew such-and-such house was the one for me right off the bat. It doesn’t work like that. Nothing should work like that, because then we’d all breeze through life getting everything we want, and what’s the fun of a life without rejection? How boring.

Contrary to the Bid Day pictures that spammed your insta feed in mid-August (they were simply unavoidable), Rush is not all happiness and blowing glitter. The whole week is an emotional roller coaster of rejection, acceptance, and confusion, but no one wants to tell you that.

No one wants to tell you what exactly you’re throwing yourself into with Rush, because it’s kind of a week-long endurance test.

There were times throughout the week when I lost steam and questioned if Greek life was right for me, but with each house that dropped me, I always remembered something my rho-chi leader said to our group at the beginning of that week: “You’re going to end up where you’re meant to end up.”

Sappy, right? That’s like saying that the boy who’s meant to be with me will be with me. So...where is this ‘boy’ then? Hm?

My rho-chi was right, though. The house I ended up getting a bid to is exactly where I should have ended up, but it wasn’t my first or second pick initially. It’s like realizing that the sweet guy you kept on the back burner all this time is actually a keeper that you’d totally take home to your mom, and the hot, bad boy that only hits you up after midnight isn’t your type after all. He likes Country music, c’mon. It would never work.

People love to hate on Greek life. I’d be lying if I said I don’t love the a stereotypical frat kid joke. Are Saturdays for the boys, bro? Okay. Just making sure. It’s fun, it’s harmless, and most of the time, it’s accurate.

But if anything truly wowed me during my first semester of college, it’s that sororities at my school are nothing like what I had anticipated them to be. I saw hardly any Lilly Pulitzer during Rush. *huge sigh of relief*. Granted, I did no research prior to Rush. I HIGHLY recommend this.

It’s like that one Christmas season that my mom conveniently left her email up, and I conveniently saw a confirmation email from Amazon. You know where the rest of this story goes. Do you know how painfully uneventful and boring that Christmas was? It’s unfair to both yourself and the girls recruiting you to go in with a preconceived notion of what stereotypes and reputations each house represents. If the house you researched relentlessly and fell in love with drops you, the rest of Rush will more than likely be disappointing.

No expectations = no disappointment.

If you’re seriously considering Greek life and think it’s for you, don’t look into it too much or get gossip-y! Throw yourself into the situation with an open mind because believe me, even the girls who got 20 rec letters for each house are just as confused about Rush as you are. Be confused together.

Sororities are about sisterhood and empowering women, not about getting into the “hot sorority” or the “bad sorority.”

My sister was involved in Greek life at the same college as me, and I truly had my heart set on being a legacy. I didn’t want her to tell me about her own house or any of the other ones for that matter because I was so adamant about not allowing my opinion to be swayed. I literally just liked the thought of being a legacy.

When that house dropped me, I was pissed, confused, and well, pissed. However, in retrospect, it wasn’t meant to be. Although my sister and I are essentially the same person despite the fact that she’s brunette and I’m blonde, that doesn’t mean I’m automatically eligible to be in the same house as her. Getting dropped sucks at the time, but it’s SO crucial to remember that it’s not that deep. It’s not a personal attack on your character and everything you stand for, although it may feel like it at the time.

In no way am I resentful for getting dropped from that particular house. I have plenty of awesome friends in that house. If I am bitter about anything, it’s that I wish I hadn’t focused so heavily on winning the approval of a particular house because it overshadowed my opinion of other ones.

As the week progressed, I fell in love more and more with the house I eventually got a bid to. Even to this day I can’t imagine myself anywhere else, and I’m only one semester in.

I understand that Rush doesn’t result in such a happy ending for everyone, but for those girls lucky enough to truly find their home have open-mindedness to thank, in my opinion. Isn’t that how all things work? Don’t get butthurt over rejection, it just means something better is coming.

Moral of the story: Rush is confusing and exhausting, but worth it. Worth wiping out in wedges in front of a frat house to make it on time for rounds, you ask? Yes, I can say from personal experience, it’s still worth all the trouble in the long run.

A.S